Some mother's only child scavenging through multiple minefields of murk running mild voice through mounds of mouldy madness,
...And I thought that best minds of a generation destroyed by madness was the howl of yesteryear
...And I thought volcanic magma forming molten galapagos beneath this coney island of the mind is Ferlinghetti's invention fed from verbal diarrheas and imbecile illusions of happiness
...And I thought sunset coming to Sapitwa was Mtshali's trick to while away the prison-house flatulence of old Botha-lore
Till you came and sowed your fetid rancour in my soul...
Now I must return to the other Babel and weep like that other prophet
Who saw the startling vision of rigor mortis and chose to sing eternal elegies to the glories of gangrene:
Expect me my dear would-have-been heartcrest expect me
And then you shall see me coming
Death and death and death. Pain-drops of poisoned chalice preying on life:
The death that killed Kristofa killed Fanon killed Wallace killed Darweesh
Killed Saro-Wiwa killed Marachera killed all of them is killing me now...
Terrible beauty so terribly beautiful so heartbreakingly beautiful
So beautifully heartbreaking the words you spoke tonight my dear and to think I thought you were the best and to think that I thought you deserved celestial platforms celestial angels serenading your celestial essence
So terribly beautiful the way you rendered this latest version of the Judas kiss the Brutus stab the Kotey land the Tsokopi prayer the father love the the Trendy hug the Linda virgin scream the uncle welfare wink
Now I have to bear the solitary burden of a nighttime of multiple orgasms of blood flash-flooding down eye-spaces tearing lashes while the owl of our sub-conscious croons again:
Expect me my dear home-hope expect me
And soon you shall see me coming in the coffin you chose for me
And you placed your virgin lips on my sinful shoulders and spoke your angel tongue into my Sodom bedlam
Pointing innocently to how it is always about the little things that you do...the little things that you do...
Pointing to what must be obvious to me by now: this little thing that you said and broke open the thinly veiled scarified fore of life-old wound
Innocently jostling your own pure pus into my boil-plated knees and sending the searing fire of your carefree slash into my hiccup-ing psyche hiccuping from the many constant wars that each day must bring
And you well know that I have survived this far because I have made the distinction between those who don't matter and those who do and that I have made exceptions for you because I swore you were different you were better than them all
And having made the exceptions for you I went ahead and laughed at those who stand across the walls throwing stones at us horrible stones at us deadly stones at us Judas stones at us cowardly stones at us...
Yet because you were the one so close you leave gashing footprints handprints mouthprints all over even if you scratch only the surface I bruise easily even when I hold my face straight while I ask them to sing
Expect me my dear homesoil expect me
Because you shall see me coming soon and soon and soon
Now I must remove to hell-hole/revise old ode to dunghill/call back saved pains to pay debts of new pricey joys....
Launko/Cavafy/Rilke/Cellini/Darweesh/Akpalu lee!!! It is only another sunset scarring our old woundspots
But what does one do when Sunset comes to Sapitwa?
